This book presents a provocative challenge to the conventional wisdom of raising children. Author of nine books, including
the controversial "Punished by Rewards", Kohn expands upon the theme of what's wrong with our society's emphasis on punishments
and rewards with regards raising children. Kohn, the father of young children himself, sprinkles his text with anecdotes that
shore up his well-researched hypothesis that children do best with unconditional love, respect and the opportunity to make
their own choices. Kohn questions why parents and parenting literature focus on compliance and quick fixes, and points out
that docility and short-term obedience are not what most parents desire of their children in the long run. He insists that
"controlling parents" are actually conveying to their kids that they love them conditionally - that is, only when they achieve
or behave. Tactics like time-out, brides and threats, Kohn claims, just worsen matters. Caustic, witty and thought-provoking,
Kohn's arguments challenge much of today's parenting wisdom, yet his assertion that "the way kids learn to make good decisions
is by making decisions, not by following directions" rings true.
Kohn suggests parents help kids solve problems; provide
them with choices; and use reason, humour and, as a last resort, a restorative time away (not a punitive time-out).